Has
a man ever told you that you’re a great friend, but he isn’t feeling romantic
about you? If so, it may be because you’re doing a great job connecting with a
man’s head and intellect, but doing nothing to trigger passion in his heart.
You’re afraid to let your guard down and show your true feelings because you
don’t want to be hurt again. But this fear is keeping you from emotionally
connecting with a man.
Instead,
take these three steps:
Step 1:
Stop analyzing and obsessing
Women
believe the lie that men fear displays of emotion. Actually, what men can’t
stand is “drama,” but they fall to their knees in adoration for a woman who can
feel something and communicate it in a non-judgmental, non-critical and
vulnerable way.
Allow
yourself to feel every emotion, even if it’s not interesting or pleasant. When
you stop analyzing why and just feel, you’ll feel more fully yourself, more
alive, and therefore you’ll automatically be more attractive to every man.
Step 2:
Get out of your head and into your feelings
What
are your conversations with a man like?
“Opinions
are good for an occasional lively discussion with friends, but they don’t do
anything to inspire him to love you.”
If
you’re in your head, you are probably expressing a lot of opinions and facts
about things. That’s not very romantic. Opinions are good for an occasional
lively discussion with friends, but they don’t do anything to inspire him to
love you.
Instead,
notice how you feel about things throughout your day. Whenever you catch
yourself lost in your thoughts, to-do lists or opinions, take yourself back to
how you feel in the moment.
Step 3:
Communicate using the phrase “I feel,” not “I Think… ”
Speak
from your feelings. Start sentences with “I feel” instead of “I think.” This
may seem odd at first. You may be afraid that if you do this, a man will think
you’re silly or too emotional or that you’ll scare him off. Actually, the exact
opposite is true.
The
more you’re able to share your emotions in a man’s presence without going into
drama and telling him what’s wrong with him, the closer he’s going to want to
get to you.
The
best way to help a man connect to his tender, emotional side is by knowing how
you feel and being able to clearly and honestly communicate it to him.
When
you start connecting with his heart this way, he’ll be more affectionate and loving
with you. He may even start sharing what he feels with you.
Taking
these steps changed my marriage nearly overnight. Even now, whenever I spend
too much time discussing things instead of feeling juicy and romantic, I remind
myself to do these three things and everything shifts like magic.
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